I DID IT - I DRANK A SURLY "FURIOUS"

And I'm a far better man for it. My first beer from Minneapolis' SURLY BREWING came to via post by "The Captain" from The Captain's Chair blog - thank you my friend - and it's even better than I'd prepared myself for. Oh, no question I was "psyched beyond belief", but this hopped-out imperial red ale from a big tall boy can is flat-out outstanding. The gang from SURLY, who are newer on the brewing scene than even this blog, are hitting it out of the park by all accounts, which is why I was so desperate to finally trade for some. I'll admit, I've taken better photos before, but I've had only a couple dozen better beers in my drinking life.

SURLY FURIOUS smells fantastic, with fresh hops and an aromatic mix of scotch-ale style malts and even pineapple in the mix. The pundits call it an IPA, and maybe they're right, but it tastes to me more like a malty Scottish ale that's been infused with a insanely liberal dose of hops, then balanced perfectly. In case you're not familiar with the concept of "International Bitterness Units", or IBU's, this has got 99 of 'em, and that's about as high as you can go - so no namby-pambys allowed here. Fluffy head, fresh taste, and just a winning combination of flavors all around. 9.5/10.

GRAND TETON BREWING’s “BLACK CAULDRON”

Sometimes you’ll be perusing the shelves of your local beer store, and some random brewery you’re altogether unfamiliar will all of a sudden have their entire lineup on display and for sale. Obviously someone just signed a distribution deal and is now available in your state or locale. What kills me is thinking of the breweries I wish were distributed in my state whom this new brewer’s perhaps scored a deal in place of – in Northern California, good examples of brewers we're missing include Southern Tier, Captain Lawrence, Boulevard, Smuttynose, Surly, Brooklyn, and so on. Now a few of those probably don’t have the production ability to distribute to all markets that desire their beers, and others just want to keep their stuff local for other reasons.

Then there are unheralded brewers like GRAND TETON BREWING from Victor, ID. Their beers all of a sudden showed up in all the better Bay Area beer stores late last year. Who are these guys? Why them? Who are they stealing shelf space from? Wait – what if their beers are good? I decided to buy one and find out. I’ve got this friend, Mark, and this guy just loves him an imperial stout or porter. Crank up the alcohol, make it as black and as coffee/chocolate/roasted as possible, and he’s in heaven. I was in the midst of buying him some of these beers a few weeks ago, and came upon GRAND TETON BLACK CAULDRON. Looked like a dark, evil, scary, high-ABV imperial stout. Aw hell, I reckoned, I’ll pick one up for him and for myself. “I’m darn glad I did”.

Wow! Where did this come from? BLACK CAULDRON is a smooth, medium-bodied, vanilla/cocoa stout that is actually quite approachable. Sure, it’s 8% alcohol, but it doesn’t have that harsh, deep-roasted flavor you get from a lot of these big boy beers (and yeah, I know that 8% is not quite the 10-11% a lot of these clock in at). But more than that – it’s really, really delicious. The balance is incredible, and the tastes are really rich and inviting. A bit of a surprise, and it’s a 12-ounce bottle so it’s not exactly a wreck-the-night, time-to-go-to-bed investment if you choose to drink it by yourself. I want to spread the word about this one. Will you help me? 8.5/10.

AVERY "SIXTEEN" - THREE IN A ROW?

AVERY BREWING, like a lot of yr better brewers, are pumping out an anniversary ale every year, one named according to the anniversary of incorporation - e.g. AVERY FOURTEEN, AVERY FIFTEEN, etc. It just so happens that those two aforementioned beers were absolutely fantastic, and among the finest beers in creation the years they were created. I scored them a 9.5/10 and a 9/10 respectively, the latter score being an "upgrade" from my second tasting of it on draft at the Spuyten Duyvil in NYC. So it was with great gusto and aplomb that I hunted down a bottle of AVERY SIXTEEN last month. I like how the annual anniversary ale - like STONE, like PORT - is a wholly different style than the one before it. This one's a saison. Let's check it out.

AVERY SIXTEEN was brewed once - one batch, over and done. It is a clear, ultra-light, almost see-through saison. It steps on the scales at 7.7% ABV, which is what you'd expect from AVERY - no pussyfooting allowed. It's got tastes of citrus, honey and of course a very particular Belgian strain of yeast, along with a slight "grassy" aftertaste. Soft malts, a little bit of tartness, yet everything's in balance and quite good. It's not the intense anniversary bomb they've dropped on us in the past, but I'd say it's a good 'un. 7/10.

ALESMITH IPA & YOUR NEW IPA CHECKLIST

If you’ve written about beer before on a blog, Beer Advocate, Rate Beer etc., you may have noticed that writing about the India Pale Ale can get a little samey after a while. There’s an A/B quality to this beer style – is it this, or is it this? Does it have a little of this, or a lot of this? Keeping IPA-reviewing boredom in mind, I submitted a big bottle of ALESMITH IPA, straight outta San Diego and one of the most heralded IPAs of our time, to a bruising checklist-style quiz as I ingested it. I believe you will find the answers highly illuminating. You may use this checklist for future IPA study in your own home, or when out at the bar with friends and loved ones. It is certain to take your conversation – and perhaps even your luck with the opposite sex – to the next level. Here goes – ALESMITH IPA:

1. Is this IPA hoppy, really hoppy, or ultra hoppy? Really hoppy.
2. Would you say it’s more West Coast, East Coast or English? West Coast all the way.
3. Piney, or citrus? Piney.
4. Smooth or sharp? Smooth.
5. Normal foam head, giant foam head or no foam head? Definitely a giant foam head here.
6. Light, medium or high carbonation? Highly carbonated.
7. Dissipating bitterness, or strong bitterness on the aftertaste? Very strong bitterness.
8. Any unusual fruits in the mix, or just the de rigeur grapefruit? Grapefruit only here.
9. Golden, deep golden, amber or orange? Amber.
10. Hop lover’s dream, hop lover’s wet dream, or hop lover’s orgy in heaven with 42 virgins? Hop lover’s dream.
11. Most importantly - where does it fall on the Hedonist Beer Jive ten-point scale? 7/10.

A TRIP TO CAFÉ BIERE

There’s this place that opened last year & has existed under the radar in Emeryville, CA called CAFÉ BIERE that I’ve been meaning to check out. First, let’s talk about where Emeryville is. It’s basically the first town you hit as you come off the Bay Bridge from San Francisco, so on a traffic-less day (right!) you can get from the heart of SF to the heart of Emeryville, such as it is, in about 15 minutes. Emeryville, where I happen to work 5 days a week, is a tiny, formerly-industrial burg sorta nestled at three angles between Berkeley, Oakland, and the San Francisco Bay. When I was growing up it was all warehouses and driftwood; then IKEA opened in the mid-90s, and it got on urban folks’ radar. Condos were built, a big outdoor mall was built, dot-com companies moved out there, and voila. The conditions were created for a below-the-radar, out-of-the-way Belgian beer bar/restaurant called CAFÉ BIERE to open in 2009.

No one I know had ever told me about this place, but I think it came up in a Yelp or Google search I did one time and I was dumbfounded. A killer beer place just a mile or two from the office? Are you kidding me?? Before my jaunt to last night’s Golden State Warriors game in Oakland, I decided to check it out. CAFÉ BIERE is on Adeline Street at the very border with Oakland, across the street from some condos and just a couple blocks away from the PIXAR campus. It re-creates what I imagine to be the Belgian bar/restaurant feel quite well – small, cramped but not annoyingly so, and with wood-block tables for all customers (no actual bar). The beer menu is outstanding, with the not-insignificant complaint that it only slightly matched the menu they had online (so my goal of having a sober glass of DESCHUTES BLACK BUTTE XXI was dashed). Moreover, of the 12 or so draft selections, 5 of them were gone – naturally, including the really special, high-demand stuff like THE ABYSS and DRAKE’S DENOGGANIZER. I understand that taps run dry – happens to the best of ‘em – but this place needs to get its supply chain and web updating skills updated for the 21st century.

OK – so they still have a fantastic selection. Tons of Belgian and Belgian-style beer in bottles, including all the Trappist beers, the entire Unibroue lineup, even my #2 fave beer of all time, BRASSERIE DES ROCS TRIPLE IMPERIALE (to say nothing of #1, TRAPPIST ROCHEFORT 8, which is here as well). There are a number of American beers from DOGFISH HEAD, ALLAGASH and other heavyweights, and some cool locals like 21ST AMENDEMENT’s MONK’S BLOOD, which they had on tap. Service – at least for the one pint I had time to quaff – was excellent. I ordered a draft DESCHUTES HOP HENGE IPA, trying to give it another chance after savaging it in this 4/5/2007 review. Alas, my review was spot-on back then: a medicinal, over-hopped, poorly-balanced IPA that is just a little too much of a good thing. The ideas are fine, the execution is not – and when there are 200 other highly-hopped IPAs vying for a share of your wallet, this one should not get the nod. It certainly won’t for me. 5.5/10.

Great vibe, cool little space, and I definitely want to come back here and order some mussels and pomme frites. HBJ says check it out.

BRUNEHAUT ABBAYE VAN ST. MARTIN TRIPEL

You remember how we told you we were going to be trying more random Belgian beers in 2010? “Belgian roulette”, we like to call it. Well the other day I made good on that claim, and picked up a bottle of BRUNEHAUT ABBAYE VAN ST. MARTIN TRIPEL, on the indisputable & completely inarguable notion that tripels from Belgium are among the greatest pleasures to be known by man. Never heard of these fellas (BRUNEHAUT BREWERY in Brunehaut, Belgium- just outside of “Rongy”), never seen there beers before – but something about this one was fetching. Turns out that it was a good call, as Belgian roulette often is.

ST. MARTIN TRIPEL is a classic tripel-style ale, true to form in every way. Spicy, smooth, with a light sweetness and a definite citrus character. It’s a hazy, straw-colored beer, just as you’d expect, and its yeasts are aromatic and dominant; as I understand it, that’s what brings out that intense “spicy” characteristic in the best tripels. I’m not gonna say that this is ultimately world-class, but it’s really good and easily worth a grab if you get the gumption. 7.5/10.

HITACHINO NEST “COMMEMORATIVE ALE”

Craft beer from Japan is a improbable reality these days, with KIUCHI BREWERY (commonly known under their brand, HITACHINO NEST, and their wacky owl mascot) leading the way, at least in terms in imports & perception in the USofA. I can’t speak for the others I’ve read about – primarily BAIRD BREWERY – mostly due to lack of availability and/or cost when I have found it. But KIUCHI/HITACHINO, I know them. Their WHITE ALE is everywhere, including a ton of Japanese restaurants I’ve been to over the past year. The other day while shopping for new ales to put into my belly, I picked up a 12-oz. bottle of their COMMEMORATIVE ALE, mostly because I thought I’d read somewhere that it was outstanding. Turned out that that was actually their CELEBRATION ALE. Ah well.

HITACHINO NEST COMMEMORATIVE ALE is a real “foamer”, as the picture you see here will attest. Don’t worry, that thing calms down after a spell. It’s actually a pretty interesting beer. Close your eyes. Picture if you will a Belgian witbier – a little spicy, with tastes of orange peel and cinnamon. Now give it the malty heft and the darker feel of a winter warmer, along with a nutmeg-like taste. I know, right? It’s got a great smell, and there’s a lot going on here. For the most part it comes together really well, and it’s adventurous without being obnoxious or too difficult for a craft beer rookie to ingest. Hedonist Beer Jive says, “Oishii desu ne!”. 7/10.

DOGFISH HEAD GIVES ME A RAISON D’ETRE

A couple of years ago I was lucky enough to try a beer from DOGFISH HEAD called RAISON D’EXTRA, a 2005 imperial & seasonal version of their year-round beer RAISON D’ETRE. It blew me away. I called it a “barrel-aged cookie beer”. I knew I got lucky to encounter it on tap in Washington DC, and yet I’d never seen its precedent beer, RAISON D’ETRE, until the other night in Las Vegas. That beer’s pretty damn good as well. It is described by the brewer as “A deep, mahogany ale brewed with beet sugar, green raisins, and Belgian-style yeast. As complex as a fine, red wine.” I would hasten to add that it is also a thin-bodied (not deep), near-opaque beer that tastes very Monk-like – smooth, mildly sweet, and rocking some serious caramel malts. It has 8% alcohol and you taste every bit of it. This is the kind of beer that has made DOGFISH HEAD’s reputation – bursting with craft and care, and “off-centered” enough to be truly unique & cool. 7.5/10.

MIKKELLER/BREWDOG “DEVINE REBEL”: THE WALLET AND THE DAMAGE DONE

We humans can’t help but be hornswaggled at times by the whole “price as a cue for quality” trope. If you’ve read anything about the psychology of shopping – and I actually have – you know that a desirable piece of merchandise priced higher than you might otherwise have expected gains a certain bonus cachet simply by virtue of the high price. "It’s expensive, so it must be good". How often this turns out to be untrue – and yet, how fantastic when it is true.

I’m talking of course about the $16.99 twelve-ounce bottle of MIKKELLER/BREWDOG “DEVINE REBEL” that I tried this week and was floored by. Take one outstanding itinerant Danish brewer (MIKKELLER), and pair them with an upstart Scottish brewer (BREWDOG), and put ‘em to work making an English-style barleywine. Release it in limited quantities, keep the information on the label vague, then price it high enough to make it super-desirable for beer dorks like Jay Hinman to spring for in a moment of weakness. Check, check and check. I walked out of the store feeling guilty and remorseful, consoling myself that it were bad or even mediocre, I could savage it on Hedonist Beer Jive as consolation.

DEVINE REBEL is the best beer I’ve had in 2010 (OMG!!!). It is a 12.5% bomb of a barleywine, and yet so smooth and perfect and flavorful that you might as well be drinking the proverbial liquid nirvana. Butterscotch, caramel and dried fruit mix with straight-up scotch, and the results are stu-friggin’-pendous. It’s full-bodied and just about completely uncarbonated. I’ve never had a BREWDOG beer before, so if you’ve got any recommendations for their stuff, lemme know. MIKKELLER, well so far I’ve only had their single-hop IPA series, because everything else I see of theirs is so off-the-charts expensive, but this is one time I’m glad I let the insidious marketing manipulators get to me. 9.5/10.

ST-AMBROISE VINTAGE 2009: MEDIOCRE THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT

In January 2009 I was presented with a cylindrical object, a “tube” you might call it, from a Canadian gentleman of my acquaintance. This fine fellow went out of his way to procure for me a bottle of ST-AMBROISE 20TH ANNIVERSARY VINTAGE ALE, 2009, a product of McAUSLAN BREWING from Quebec. I’d had their APRICOT WHEAT ALE (6.5/10) and their OATMEAL STOUT (6/10) – hmm, some very middling scores there – but this one, now this one was going to special. I was asked to “age” it, a concept very foreign to me. “Age” a beer instead of drink it right away with extreme prejudice? Por quoi? Well, I did as I was told, and tucked VINTAGE ALE 2009 into the dark recesses of my garage for a year. When the clock struck 12 and 2010 began, I brushed the dust off the never-completely-forgotten cyclinder, carefully unpacked the twelve-ounce bottle inside, and I commenced to drinking. This was going to be a very, very special evening.

…..Or was it? ST-AMBROISE 20TH ANNIVERSARY VINTAGE ALE 2009 is a reddish-brown strong ale, with somewhat-defined “notes”, you might say, of sugar, rum and dates. That said, these tastes are not defined nor bold enough to be particularly interesting. Malts rule the day here. In fact the word on the street for this one is that it’s actually an “English Barleywine”, which, given my Amero-centric barleywine biases, means that it’s probably a bit “watered down” compared to my imperial assumptions. That turns out to be the case here, though by no means is this a bad beer or even a less-than-good beer. It’s just not complex enough to be worth the grandiose packaging & the whole “aging” hoo-hah. 6.5/10.

MOYLAN’S AND THE SINGLE IPA THAT WASN’T

It’s another in a liquid parade of beer reviews here at the HBJ – thanks for keeping up. I hope we’re directing you toward your next set of drinks every week; if not, well, we’re just not doing our job. The next up is the seemingly unflashy IPA from MOYLAN’S BREWING. Now if you’ve been reading this site anytime in the past four years, you know we’ve tended to make a really big deal about HOPSICKLE, their “triple IPA”. It’s one of the all-time hopped-up greats, and currently resides at #6 on the Hedonist Beer Jive 75. These guys are also rocking a double IPA called the MOYLANDER, and then there’s the “single IPA” called – that’s right – MOYLAN’S IPA. I checked the blog archives recently and realized I’d never had it. Otherwise, we would have told you. Hence my purchase, and hence my ingestion of it Sunday evening.

This is the biggest, baddest “single IPA” I’ve had all year. MOYLAN’S IPA brings forth exceptionally strong hops, and they’re balanced in a fantastic citrus vs. pine blend. There’s a ton of sweet malts and a decidedly spicy aftertaste. It may “only” be clocking in at 6.5% alcohol, but there’s no doubt that any blind taste-tester would call this one a Double IPA for sure. It’s excellent. Now the leap from here to HOPSICKLE is a big one – Hopsickle is just insane with the hops – but not as much as you might think. They may be under the radar nationwide and even locally, but man, does MOYLAN’S make a fantastic set of IPAs. 8/10.

TENAYA CREEK’s “10TH ANNIVERSARY ALT”

Every time I go to Las Vegas, which unfortunately is at least twice a year for work, I always get a hankering to visit the one and only true craft brewer I know about out there, TENAYA CREEK BREWERY. Trouble is, on an expense account it’s still difficult to justify a $30 cab fare each way “for dinner”, as this place is nowhere near The Strip (and good for them, because The Strip is maybe my least favorite place on earth). So I have to let their beer come to me. I’ve only tried one other drink from these guys before, TENAYA CREEK IMPERIAL STOUT, which I rated 7/10 two years ago. This time I was served up a glass of TENAYA CREEK 10TH ANNIVERSARY ALT; yep, the pride of Dusseldorf, transplanted to the Las Vegas Strip by a Nevada brewer. Let’s see what transpired.

10TH ANIVERSARY ALT is a clear copper altbier, very clean in its taste but still with a sharpness I didn’t recognize from my alt-drinking days in the altstadt in Dusseldorf, ahhhh, back in 2002. Some hoppiness and bittering to go with the faint caramel taste, and medium carbonation. You know what? There’s just not a lot of there there. It’s not an easy-drinker that you’d want to have a few of, nor is it “an event” the way some I’ll-only-try-it-once-in-my-life beers can be. I’m going to keep trying TENAYA CREEK beers as I come across them – just not this one. 5.5/10.

DOGFISH HEAD “INDIAN BROWN ALE”

While it’s fantastic that DOGFISH HEAD started distributing beer within California about a year ago, the lineup of ales that they allow into my state is only a subset of their overall lineup. We get the 60- and 90 Minute IPAs; the Festina Peche; the Midas Touch, Palo Santo Marron and the Aprihop, and maybe one other that I’m forgetting. No bombers, and none of the stuff I’ve been drooling about for years. So I’m in Las Vegas this week for work, and what do I see at Mandalay Bay’s excellent beer oasis BURGER BAR but a solid selection of draft & bottled DOGFISH HEAD specialties, many of which I’ve never had before? That’s what I decided to have them pull me first, starting with the INDIAN BROWN ALE. And yeah, those are my fries.

The shtick with this one – and with these guys, there’s always a shtick – is that INDIAN BROWN ALE is an IPA crossed with a traditional English brown ale. Hence the name!! And it truly does have the hoppiness of a very well-hopped IPA, no question about it. It’s a 7.2% ABV beer, and to me it tastes much like a strong ale loaded with hops a la ARROGANT BASTARD. A little jarring, actually. Medium carbonation, slight roasted flavor, and a “finish” that had me reconsidering my initial love for this one. Yeah, they had me at “hello” for sure but start losing me right before “goodbye”. Perhaps a little too bitter, but still an ale of class and distinction as you’d expect. 6.5/10.

SOUTHERN TIER’s “CRÈME BRULEE STOUT”

Sure, I expected this to be a “dessert beer”, but perhaps I wasn’t prepared for the dessertiest dessert beer in dessertland. Man, SOUTHERN TIER’s “CRÈME BRULEE STOUT” is a sweet, creamy stout that tastes like a big fat cake – and OBTW (“oh by the way”), it’s really, really delicious. This was my New Year’s Eve beer, and came into my possession courtesy of Aaron over at The Vice Blog in our recent bomber-for-bomber exchange.

The first thing you’re looking for in a beer of this ilk is the whole, “well is it really gonna taste like crème brulee or just some sickeningly sweet beer”? I’m here to report that from the first fragrant whiff, which smells like vanilla and cream, you’re in for a pretty special glass or two of beer. It really invents a new category for itself: "Cake beer". It is balanced well and even feels a little liquor-like at times, but I don’t think the ABV is all that high. Wait, let’s check the internet and see. Shut my mouth – it’s 9.2%! CRÈME BRULEE STOUT pours with no head and is medium bodied, with very mild hops tingling in the distant background. Mine even had lots of sediment in it, just the way the Belgians do it. This was about perfect for kissing off the decade and I’m dang glad I drank one. I hope you get to as well. 8/10.

ODIN! ODIN! ODIN!

Anyone remember the late 80s hair metal documentary “The Decline of Western Civilization, Part 2: The Metal Years”? Then you probably recall a ridiculous band (among the many ridiculous bands) called ODIN, and the bubble-brained blonde who was interviewed about them (“I’d like to go into actressing”) and then led the meager crowd into a pre-show cheer of “Odin! Odin! Odin!”. Now let’s loop back to the post I’m writing for you right now about LA JOLLA BREW HOUSE’s excellent imperial red ale called…..wait for it…..ODIN.

I’ve said before, but I’ll say it again – the “imperial red” – aka a malty red/amber ale will a ridiculous load of hops – is one of my favorite styles of beer, period. I know it’s a brand-new style, but it is truly differentiable from the IPA or Double IPA by virtue of the rich, caramel maltiness that goes with the tongue-bruising hops. LA JOLLA ODIN, which I had on draft at the pub last week, is a dark reddish-brown, very carbonated ale. Yes, it is highly hopped, to the point of tingling bitterness (you know you love it). If these guys were going to start bottling their wares, this would be the one to go with, and which gives LAGUNITAS IMPERIAL RED a good run for its proverbial money. 8/10.

THE MORTAL SIN – DIEU DU CIEL’s “PÉCHÉ MORTEL”

PÉCHÉ MORTEL is a well-loved coffee-infused stout from our pals at DIEU DU CIEL up Canada way, and it’s currently the #21 ranked beer in the world, according to the dorkosphere. I remember whinging about not being able to find a bottle of it a few months ago in another DIEU DE CIEL review of mine, and was reminded by a reader that it’s been available all over the US, including in my area, all along. I just saw right through it. Well, bought a bottle of it the other day to see what all the hubbub was about. Is it another imperial hype-mongerer, or is it a truly world-class beer? Let’s check.

First things first – it’s a full-on coffee beer, no doubt about it. That’s the predominant taste, so hopefully you’ve a java hound like I am. Think it was any accident that I took a picture of this beer next to our espresso machine? Well actually it was. PÉCHÉ MORTEL has a decidedly boozy smell, but I’m not really getting it in the taste – which is just the way I like it. It’s roasted, a little like burnt coffee and wood - and even a little spicy – yet it brings the alcohol and the coffee together really well. I’ll be honest, though – compared to some of the other inky-black, roasted/bitter stouts on the block these days, this one’s a bit of a trailer. I really enjoyed it, and may very well buy it again – but if I stack it against the PANNEPOT OLD FISHERMAN’S ALE I had last month, PÉCHÉ MORTEL takes a backseat. With an HBJ score of 7.5/10 though, there’s still lots to love.

HEDONIST BEER JIVE’S RESOLUTIONS FOR 2010

It was a banner weekend on the beer front this past 4-day stretch. I purchased my first beer fridge, guaranteed to make my electrical bill go up by a good 25%, all for the lofty and very worthwhile goal of fresh, unspoiled beer. I then filled that fridge on a mother-of-all-beer-runs citywide trip to HEALTHY SPIRITS, CITY BEER and BEVMO. Finally, I ran over 20 miles in a single week (over 3 individual days, no less), thereby earning the right to continue this bad, filthy, vice-filled craft beer addiction. With that in mind, here are 7 resolutions for 2010, all formulated during the last of those three runs:

1. Let exercise beget drink, and drink beget exercise. In my world, these two passions are highly correlated. Beer is the reward for my running regimen, and running is, at times, the penance for my beer regimen. Otherwise I let my 42-year-old creaking carcass fall into a shambles & I move into the “sweatpants stage” of middle age. I’m just not ready yet.

2. Ingratiate myself more into the craft beer world without becoming a self-serving, suck-up toadie. This simply means that I’d like to be a little more social and a little less hermetic. Having met other folks over the years who enjoy this great beverage in the same manner that I do, I’ve found that some of them are actually OK, including brewers, journalists and beer shop operators. I’d like to find ways to break bread with more of them, without becoming a namedropping, star-chasing, ass-kissing cretin.

3. Try a gueze for the first time. Yes, you read that correctly. I’m well overdue to try this style of ale. By 2011, I shall have ingested one or several.

4. Conduct more interviews on Hedonist Beer Jive. Who wants to read about me and my drinking habits all the time? I’ve enjoyed the interviews I’ve posted here over the years, but in ’09 we only did one. I promise to do better this year.

5. Never, ever make beer puns like “good for what ales you”, “Hoppy Holidays”, etc. Folks, beer is not funny. You are not funny when you conduct in this type of reprehensible behavior. Let’s only reserve this type of wankery for truly hilarious blog post headlines such as “There Will Be Monk’s Blood”. Now THAT – that is funny.

6. Drink more of the obscure Belgians, at the expense of the falsely hyped American micros. I’m going to slow down my chasing of overly- and often inaccurately-hyped American beers and try and get to all those Belgian ales I’ve never had before. Seems like I’m always happier when I’ve got a bunch of complex tripels, dubbels and Abbey ales in the fridge. I plan to have more of them, from smaller breweries from the darkest wilds of Belgium, in 2010.

7. Drink beer from Surly Brewing and New Glarus Brewing. Now all I need is a Minnesota/Wisconsin-based beer trading partner. I’ve got some Anchor Steam to trade ya!

A TALE OF TWO SMUTTYNOSE

I've got a backlog of beer stories to share with you, so let's go all the way back to early December 2009. Dateline: December 2009. Location: New York City. Hedonist Beer Jive is on a business trip. We've, in the preceeding 48 hours, been to both the RATTLE-N-HUM and GINGER MAN bars in Midtown Manhattan and imbibed fantastic ales. Now we've finished all work-related activities, which concluded in Times Square around 3pm. We know that the secret H&H Bagels store is walking distance away, and needing to bring something special home to the family the next day, proceed in that direction. Having done our homework, we also know that Manhattan craft beer hotspot THE PONY BAR in only blocks away, so, with a spring in our step, start walking just a little faster.

Stepping into The Pony Bar for a celebratory post-work, post-bagel procurement beer, we find that SMUTTYNOSE WINTER ALE is on draft, along with about 29 other good-lookin' beers. But at 4.8% alcohol, this WINTER ALE seems about the ticket for an afternoon beer. After all - it ain't 5pm yet, right? What a great call this one was. This has a really intense "winter warmer" flavor, totally fresh and well carbonated. Mellow, I'd say, with the slight taste of cola. Truly like a winter dubbel if there was such a thing. Easily the best "basic" holiday ale I had this season - as opposed to the high-ABV homewreckers I'm usually throwing down. Delicious - a definite and indisputable 8/10. Oh, and I really dug this bar as well - clean, homey, and just out of the way enough I'd imagine that amateurs likely shy away. As a great man once said, "I'll be back".

The second half of this SMUTTYNOSE BREWING story isn't quite as fabulous. Flash-forward three hours. We're in Brooklyn getting dinner at an excellent, but totally empty, Italian place called PT. I order up a SMUTTYNOSE IPA - seems like all restaurants in NYC these days have good beer available with your grub. I immediately wished I'd ordered something else or refrained from beer entirely. Sharp, highly hopped, piney and just a little "off" - this is like a "microbrew" IPA from ten years ago, before the form started being perfected in this country. Honestly, I've come to expect really good things from Smuttynose, but their IPA ain't one of them. 4.5/10. More spine-tingling beer tales to come in this new year.

THERE WILL BE MONK'S BLOOD

Considering they're my favorite brewer in my hometown of San Francisco, I've done just an awful job of staying current with the beers of 21ST AMENDMENT. Since they opened well over a decade ago, all sorts of new non-TORONADO beer options have sprung to the fore in town & nearby, and so when someone wants to go grab beers these days, 21A tends to be the afterthought to The Trappist, La Trappe, the Monk's Kettle and so on. When HBJ started out (four years ago!) we worked almost across the street from the place, and thus filed frequent dispatches from the bar. Now we're over in the east bay during the 9-5, and I miss the easy access to 21A's many excellent beers of all stripes and colors, particular the many experimental Belgians they unleash during the winter months.

All that's a long way of saying I was stoked to buy a can of their brand new MONK'S BLOOD offering the other day. It's great to see a complex Belgian-style ale in a can, and it's even better when it's really good. MONK'S BLOOD is dark and malty, with an undercurrent of sweetness the dominates the brew. I taste molasses and something that tastes like bourbon, or some spirit of unknown origin. Why there it is on the spec sheet - "aged on oak". You don't get that in yr beer can every day, now do ya. It's a medium-bodied beer with almost no head retention (that's dork-talk for "no foam"), and I'd put it close to the dubbel and/or abbey ale categories if I have to pick. 7/10 - and oh yeah, happy new year folks. We'll see you with bells on in 2010.

SO HOW IS THIS YEAR'S ABYSS?

DESCHUTES BREWING unleashed a deluxe imperial stout called THE ABYSS upon the world at the tail end of 2007, yet in such insanely limited bottled quantities that I didn't even hear of it. Last year's THE ABYSS got out there in just about the right amount to both start a cult of believers (myself included) and to ensure it was limited enough to help generate a little supply-and-demand hype action. While the beer obviously speaks for itself (we rated last year's a 10/10), the marketing worked as well. This year, late 2009, DESCHUTES has let a lot more ABYSS unto the world than ever before. There are tons of bottles at my local BevMo, Whole Foods and at speciality retailers, all around a $11.99 price point, which is more than worth it in my book.

THE ABYSS 2009 version is called ABYSS 2009 RESERVE. As you might expect if you had last year's, it's amazing, and deserving of all the kudos raining down upon it. It's a rich, creamy stout - extremely roasted and intense. It has a deep coffee flavor that you can even taste in the foam, but unlike last year, I don't really taste chocolate. And I was looking for it. It's got some real burnt, "bitter" qualities, but it's all good. I've kinda got a crush on it, and I'm terrified if I don't buy some more bottles they'll stop making it. So I'm off to BevMo this weekend. Need anything? 2009 version = 9/10.

SAISONS ON PARADE: PRETTY THINGS' "JACK D'OR"

Somehow it happened that I'm drinking saisons this winter. Must be the fallout from the Pacific Coast Holiday Beer blow-out, which was all dark, rich Christmasy things. Or maybe it just happens to be what was hanging around the garage this week. In any event, I was excited to give this one a try - it's a new beer called JACK D'OR, (subtitled a "Saison Americain") from a new Boston-based brewery called PRETTY THINGS BEER & ALE PROJECT. Aaron G over at the Vice Blog picked this up for me and handed it under the table at our blow-out meet-up at Rattle-N-Hum in New York a few weeks ago. Thanks, esse.

PRETTY THINGS say "we don't brew styles per se. Instead, we re-imagine everything and leave the style numbers in books on the shelves where they belong.". They're not kidding. JACK D'OR is like a cross between a lager, a saison and an IPA. It is spicy, true - and I like that. Really strong, malty, spicy mouthfeel, and even some of the citrus characteristics of the IPA - along with the glassy, off-putting taste of a lager. And would you believe the massive, misshapen head of foam on this thing? Like nothing I've ever seen before. Fresh, full-bodied and ultimately moderately satisfying. I'll see what I can do to try the rest of their lineup in the near future. 6.5/10.

DUPONT’s “AVEC LES BONS VOEUX”

I’m a huge fan of the BRASSERIE DUPONT beers, just about all of them being subtle shades of the saison, You know – FORET, SAISON DUPONT, AVRIL, etc. Never had one I didn’t like, and well, now it’s Christmastime, and it’s time to uncork their biggest beer yet, the holiday-only AVEC LES BONS VOEUX. It’s available at Whole Foods, BevMo, and the usual places. I actually brought it to a holiday party on Saturday night, then greedily stood around shifting from foot to foot, waiting for the host to open it so I could pour myself a giant glass.

It’s a really stunning-looking beer – a cloudy, hazy, goldenrod color, like a beer-filled crystal ball. I’m not sure I’ve had a more “bready” beer in my life. Very yeasty and malty, with a slight kick of alcohol that only seems to make itself known in the aftertaste. Would you believe it’s 9.5% ABV? That’s a record for these guys. Fruity and a little pungent, in the best possible sense of the word. Vaguely sour, but more fruity and bready that anything else. Just as good as I’d heard, and even better than that big, world-class saison we reviewed yesterday. 8/10.

BOULEVARD BREWING’s “SAISON-BRETT”

When Kansas City’s BOULEVARD BREWING first came out with their limited edition “Smokestack Series” in 2008, there was a lot of deserved hullabaloo about the whole thing. These bottles had beautiful labels & were big and bountiful – but far more important, the beers themselves were fantastic. Nothing so amazingly off the charts that entirely new brewing paradigms were created, but still – this brewer does a great job with just about everything they touch, even their more pedestrian stuff, so it’d make sense that when they allow themselves to go off the rails a little, it’s gonna get interesting.

Last year they added a new jumbo beer to the stable, and I’d been waiting to get back to KC to hunt one down. As luck would have it, I was sent there for work last month, and came back with a big 22-oz. bottle of BOULEVARD SAISON-BRETT. It’s about as collector-fetish as a beer can come without putting it in a sealed box & making you line up in the morning to buy it with the great unwashed. It’s individually numbered, just like all those old 45s I used to buy. I got #4497 out of a total run of 13,400. SAISON-BRETT is a “wild saison”, made with ample amounts of uncaged yeasts. Picture if you will a very sweet farmhouse ale with a big thin head, dosed with a huge amount of tart, grapefruit-like taste from the various bacteria floating around. You’re thinking that won’t drink easy? OK, now picture it drinking really easy. Yessss…..this one’s surprising you, because YOU thought it was going to be a little more wild than it is, but it’s just a little funky, that’s all. It compares very favorably to RUSSIAN RIVER TEMPTATION, and that’s saying something. There are at most 13,399 of these left in the world (likely far less), so you might wanna get going. 7.5/10.

RIDING THE BUZZ AT THE PACIFIC COAST HOLIDAY BEER FESTIVAL

I’ve made it to the annual PACIFIC COAST BREWING “Tasting of Holiday Beers” for three of the last four years now; it’s beginning to become a regular part of the beergenda every winter. And despite the fact that during the 24 hours following this event last Saturday I’d made up my mind to never drink alcohol again – I think you probably know why – I’ll likely be there next year as well. Check this report for my 2008 briefing, and this one for my 2006 dispatch.

This time the lineup of beers was as stellar as it always is, but I knew it might be a tough road to hoe when they announced that of the 15 beers being served (and these were decent pours, roughly 5-6 ounces each), only two were below 9% ABV (and those were both above 6%). They keep the beers they’ll be serving as a secret every year, so you show up, take your assigned seat and then greedily look at your “score sheet” in front of you to see what you’ll be gobbling over the next four hours. I had two high hopes: that I’d get a chance to drink the SIERRA NEVADA/DOGFISH HEAD collaboration LIFE & LIMB again, and that SHMALTZ BREWING would be rolling out their 13% ABV, 13th-anniversary monster JEWBELATION this time. Guess what. Ka-ching. I got ‘em both, and then some.

So this score sheet they gave us, it’s got its own scoring system on a 30-point scale that’s very different than the Hedonist Beer Jive 10-point scale. They actually care about “appearance prior to taste” and assign 3 of the 30 points on that alone – HBJ could give a rat’s ass. We like a good-lookin’ beer, sure, but when you see something scored high on this blog, it has nothing to do with looks, just those elusive “inner qualities” (promise!). There are a few other qualitative quibbles as well, but you know, that’s what makes the beer dork world so goddamn interesting, doesn’t it? I recalibrated my score to my own rankings, and proceeded to rank the many beers thusly:

1. SIERRA NEVADA/DOGFISH HEAD – Life & Limb (an absolute masterpiece)
2. DESCHUTES – Black Butte XXI (big surprise here. I had not heard many superlatives thrown at this beer, but man, I absolutely loved it. A deep, rich porter with amazing coffee & roasted malt taste).
3. FIRESTONE WALKER – Double Jack (A crazy high-ABV double IPA that’s a must-try. Anyone know if this is in bottles yet?)
4. ST. BERNARDUS – Christmas Ale (this was last year’s winner for me, and it’s fantastic this year as well)
5. ST. FEUILLIEN – Cuvee De Noel
6. DRAKE’S – Jolly Roger (Delicious – you can see it pictured at the top of the post)
7. SHMALTZ – He'brew Jewbelation 13 (truth be told, this was at the end of the afternoon and I was blurring a bit. My score may be a bit informed – negatively or positively - by the fact that my tongue was already lacerated with 13 intense beers by that point)
8. STONE BREWING – 13th Anniversary Imperial Double Red (good beer – I liked it much better on draft than from the bottle)
9. ANCHOR BREWING – “Our Special Ale” aka Anchor Christmas
10. SIERRA NEVADA – Celebration 2009 (had another one of these yesterday and it’s fantastic, like it is every year, so pay no attention to its relative standing among these heavyweights on a drunken day)
11. LAGUNITAS – Brown Shugga
12. NORTH COAST – Old Stock 2007 (maybe not aging as well as before – we loved it last year for sure)
13. PORT BREWING – Santa’s Little Helper Imperial Stout
14. RUSSIAN RIVER – Consecration (Yeah, I know. This was the first time I’d ever had it, and the first beer we’d had all day, so my palate was clear. Not all that impressed, to be honest, especially compared to Temptation – maybe I need to buy a $25 bottle of it and give it another go. It’s pictured here, in case you want to get a visual contact high)
15. PACIFIC COAST BREWING – Holiday Ale (blah)

The best part was the fact that only three of these beers was a repeat from last year’s tasting. The worst part was my intense desire to drink them all, coupled with my intense desire to avoid drunkenness, which, at my advanced age, doesn’t fit me as well as it used to. In fact, I’d been riding a two-year winning streak with no hangovers that was broken by this event, which was all the more remarkable when considering that I stopped imbibing at 4pm. I cursed the light, I swore myself to a life of teetotaling, I prepared a blog post called “HBJ To Beer Events: We Quit” – and then 3 days later, I broke out a 22-oz. bottle of BOULEVARD SAISON-BRETT and enjoyed it at home. More on that next week. See you again at the PCB Fest in 2010.

BROOKLYN BREWING’S “BLACK CHOCOLATE STOUT”

BROOKLYN BREWING has this BLACK CHOCOLATE STOUT that complements their mind-blowing BLACK OPS stout very well. It’s like a little brother beer, if said little brother was an over 10% alcohol, easy-sippin’ stout that tasted like it was about half that. In fact I had to check multiple sources to corroborate that high-ABV – looks like unless everyone’s lying, that’s what it is. Wow. I enjoyed a big glass of this in New York two weeks ago as I cavorted with the coat-n-tie crowd at THE GINGER MAN – Wall Street was obviously hanging out in midtown on this night.

BLACK CHOCOLATE STOUT pours with a lovely puffy head of foam, and predictably, has a predominant aroma of chocolate. It’s a medium-bodied ale with a slightly “nutty” taste, like you might find in an English brown ale. The taste is quite bittersweet – as opposed to sweet. That chocolate gets even more pronounced as it warms, and as I said, it goes down really easily for a scary-high-ABV Russian Imperial Stout. I want another one, right about now. 7.5/10.

SAY IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT: “BLACK XANTUS”

While in New York a couple of weeks ago I had about 20 minutes to kill while visiting some friends in Brooklyn – and as luck would have it I was a mere four blocks from the famed SPUYTEN DUYVIL bar in Williamsburg, a place HBJ visited last year and wrote about here. I knew where it was, and I knew their reputation as being a bit on the know-it-all, brusque & dismissive side. Not a-holes like the douchy tattooed warriors at THE TORONADO, but the sort that throw off a we-know-best attitude when it comes to beer, and who let it show as often as possible. So I guess it was no surprise when I ordered the highly-touted NECTAR ALES “BLACK XANTUS” from the hirsute fella behind the bar and got some immediate ‘tude. I pronounced it “Black ZAN-TUHSS”. He gave me a quizzical, jeez-I-never-heard-of-it look, and told me that nope, they didn’t serve a beer called that here. I’m serious. I pointed at the tap handle to help sharpen his thinking a bit, and he gave me a big, “Ohhhh, ohhhh, you mean Black Zan-TOOS”. Zantoos. Not Zantuhss. WTF.

Here’s a terrible picture of the beer in question. It goes for double figures in bottles out in San Francisco, and I’m sure everywhere else - $16.99 is a typical price. It’s made by FIRESTONE WALKER, under their confusing NECTAR ALES brand – the same folks who make that hemp beer that I actually like. It’s a super-dark, very strong black ale. BLACK XANTUS is a succulent Russian Imperial stout, with light carbonation. The dominant flavors are vanilla and bourbon – whoa, lots of bourbon. Truly, it’s almost cocktail-like, and it lacks a lot of the richness and “meaty” quality I like in beers of this ilk. I’d call it a true beer lover’s beer, but as a beer lover I found it just a tiny disappointing. In conversation with others, reactions are all over the map – some think it’s the second coming, others think it’s a whole lot of nothing. Me, I call it a 7/10.

A TRIP TO RATTLE N HUM, NEW YORK CITY

Going to New York City for work in the olden days – i.e. my many, many trips there 2004-2006 – always meant good meals & excellent streetwalking/impulse buying, but rarely did it mean good beer. Sure, I went out for drinks with co-workers from time to time, but going to New York now means going to a city utterly transformed when it comes to your & my favorite adult beverage. This place is just loaded with amazing bars, and incredible restaurants with incredible beer selections. I was introduced to a site called BEER MENUS that the New Yorkers all seem to use to find their way around town, drink-wise, and – well – just look at it. There’s no shortage of wild Belgians, high-ABV one-offs and fresh local pints to consume across at least two of the five boroughs (I'll try Staten Island and the Bronx next time).

I decided to set my first-night-in-town sights on RATTLE N HUM in midtown Manhattan, and booked my hotel room accordingly. (“Why are you staying all the way at Park & 39th, Jay?”. “Hmm, no real reason, that’s just what came up as being in our travel policy when I tried to book a room”.). I was wary of this place initially, when I saw their name – yeah, named after the U2 album. Ouch. Yet I walked by there right when they opened last year, took a gander inside, and decided that it would be a fine place to drink some of the strangest & most unique east coast beers – what a tap list! So I shot an email to Aaron from THE VICE BLOG, whom we’ve never actually met but whom you may remember from the interview we did with him here, and he informed me that only an hour before my email another similar email had some in from The Captain, as in THE CAPTAIN’S CHAIR beer blog. He was coming to town as well, same night, and they’d already planned to meet here. Beer dork city all the way. So we made the plan, rendezvoused at Rattle & Hum at the anointed hour, and threw down a few big ones.

This was definitely a night where socializing, not note-taking, was the primary objective. So my descriptions & accounts of the beers I consumed are taken from memory & the “scrawled” digital notes I pecked into my phone. That said, I’ve rarely had a night where my shot-in-the-dark picks were more spot-on. 4 beers, 4 big winners, none of which I’ve ever had before, and only two of which were recommended to me. The others I was just wingin’ it. Here goes:

KUHNHENN “PLAY IN THE HAY” – I don’t think it’s possible to get the real story on this beer online – we had trouble even getting it at the bar itself. This weird-ass Michigan brewer, who apparently were a hardware store at one point who changed to craft brewing when Home Depot moved across the street, have a number of fruit beers, several of the cherry persuasion like this one. When Aaron G had this one a week ago, they called it HAIRY CHERRY; now it’s apparently PLAY IN THE HAY. Whatever, it’s not a lambic, as is claimed on Beer Advocate. It’s a low-ABV fruit beer that’s out of this world. Sweet, smooth and not tart in the least – just a beautiful fruit ale, with sediment at the end just to remind you that this ain’t no fruit juice. 8/10.

ALLAGASH ODYSSEY – This is the first Allagash Brewing that’s absolutely knocked my friggin’ socks off. I’m pretty sure this dark photo to your right is a picture I took of it. It’s a 10% Belgian strong dark ale; I remember thinking it tasted incredibly smooth and like something you’d have out of a snifter – oaked and mysterious and so good. Conversation and yuks kept me from doing anything but going wow-wow-wow under my breath and typing a 8.5/10 into my phone.

LONG TRAIL BREWMASTER SERIES DOUBLE IPA – Expecting a simple hoppy beer, I got this delicious double IPA with balance to die for. Never had anything from these guys before but you can bet I’ll be going back to the well next time I’m in Vermont – or here. 7.5/10.

CAPTAIN LAWRENCE FRESH CHESTER PALE ALE – I wanted to take it down a notch, have something really easy to send me back to the hotel, but with Captain Lawrence Brewing, nothing’s quite what you think it’s gonna be, and it’s usually 10 times better than anything else. This is a terrific pale ale, really creamy and piney and quite hoppier than expected. Really tasty and totally recommended. 8/10.

HUMBUG IN A BOTTLE: BRIDGEPORT’S “EBENEZER”

There’s one or two every year. Holiday beers that exist simply to round out the portfolio of a mediocre or less-than-heralded brewer, to maybe grab some shelf space they might not otherwise get. I guess my feeling is if you’re going to make a “winter warmer”, please make it a good one. Do something that makes it special, befitting what is supposed to be a special time of year. Don’t make something as boring and bland as BRIDGEPORT BREWING’s “EBENEZER”.

This Christmas ale is spiced like a 5-year-old was let into the vats and started mixing in nutmeg and hops with play-doh, flour & Burt's Bees rash cream. A real wheaty and grainy taste results, and the body of this beer is so thin it – it – why it oughta be arrested for anorexia is what I’m sayin’! Couldn't even finish it. Definitely a must to avoid this holiday season. 3/10.

TOP 40 IN FILM, 2000-2009

Seldom do we use this platform for anything but our own joie de vivre over beer, but there have been exceptions. There were the baseball picks for ’09 this past April. How’d that Boston over St. Louis World Series pick work out for us? Hey, at least they both made the playoffs. My top films of the last ten years? Well, there’s no argument there – probably not even from you once you see my picks. Yeah yeah, I got the idea from Aaron over at The Vice Blog – he did his own Top 25 last week, and challenged me, you and others to do the same. Me, I’m a listmaker – love ‘em. I went as far as 40 great films and stopped there, because after about 40 things ran a little more thin. And of course I’d have put this list on my film blog, but I don’t have one anymore.

Overall verdict? Great, great decade for film. Arguably the third best ever, after the 1970s and the 1960s, in that order. Many of the films listed here are commonly recognized as masterpieces, but I encourage you if you see something on here you’ve never heard of (my bets are on “Nobody Knows”, a sparse Japanese film about children abandoned in their apartment by their wayward mother, and “Reprise”, an excellent Danish film about what happens to two young writers & best friends when one drifts into mental illness), give it a try on Netflix or however you consume the films of the past.

Here are 40 excellent reasons why this decade was a fantastic one for film, ranked in order of how much I enjoyed them:

1. MEMENTO (2000) – I’ve seen it a half-dozen times, and it blows me away each time as much as it did the first time in 2000. Saw it two successive weeks in the theater, and spent an hour-plus each time afterward arguing it through and piecing it together with friends. Amazingly inventive, reverse-narrative thriller that’s one of my favorite films of any era. #1 with a big fat bullet for these past ten years.

2. UNITED 93 (2006) – I shed real tears after this one, probably because I’ve never seen such a hyper-real film that wasn’t a documentary. I was more caught up in and emotionally devastated by it than I was 9/11 itself. The story of United Airlines flight 93, told just as it happened in near-real time on September 11th, 2001, and starring some of the same air traffic control personnel who actually lived through the horror of that plane’s fate on the real day itself.

3. CAPTURING THE FRIEDMANS (2003) – A harrowing documentary that plays like a whodunit, all within the confines of a single messed-up Long Island family in the 1970s. Duly recognized by many as one of the great documentaries of all time and a standard-bearer for what the form is capable of.

4. THERE WILL BE BLOOD (2008) – This was an instant film classic the moment it came out, an epic sweep of one man’s greed, ego and lust for redemption in oil-crazy California a century ago. Daniel Day-Lewis puts on the performance of his lifetime, which is saying something, but the script & the direction were just as much the stars of this newly-minted landmark.

5. NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN (2008) – Only a hair’s breath behind “There Will Be Blood” in my book; I, like most others, saw both films within mere weeks of each other in 2008. That’s when I decided that the 2000s were a decade nearly as special as any other, cinema-wise. This film was terrifying for two entire hours, with foreboding & fear punctuating every slow scene, with every moment about ready to erupt. Javier Bardem is one of the all-time evil bad guys, and this is the best film the Coens have ever made as far as I’m concerned.

6. ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004) – I remember walking out of the film and telling my wife that we’d just seen a masterpiece. A film with Jim Carrey (!), no less. This was all about Michael Gondry’s direction and his & Charlie Kaufman’s masterful script. A couple undergo a procedure to erase each other from their respective memories when their relationship goes bad, yet in their loss find ways to connect again. Totally original and a blast to watch unfold on screen.

7. THE DEATH OF MR. LAZARESCU (2005) – Romanian film got a lot of very deserved attention this past decade, primarily thanks to this sad, strange film & only afterward to those that followed. The camera essentially follows a dying man through the morass of Romanian healthcare and personal indifference on one single night, as his lonely and (on the surface) meaningless life flickers out. Never seen anything quite like it. Not a feel-good film by any means, but one I can’t recommend highly enough.

8. MY SUMMER OF LOVE (2004) – This British film seems to have been passed over by a lot of folks, but it was one of the best films I saw in 2004. Two teenage girls spend a summer together in the Yorkshire countryside, and the film “charts the emotional and physical hothouse effects that bloom one summer” between them. Just when you think you’ve figured out where it’s all headed, it heads in a very unexpected direction, and turns into some devastating mind games, the kind that are all the more painful when you’re young & infatuated. Ingmar Bergman would have been very proud.

9. BORAT – CULTURAL LEARNINGS OF AMERICA FOR MAKE BENEFIT GLORIOUS NATION OF KAZAKHSTAN (2006) – A trailblazing comedy that took the mockumentary/documentary form to new highs and lows. These are some of the best pranks (and the best editing) of all time, and I’d watch this film anytime, anywhere.

10. DOGVILLE (2003) – I almost wouldn’t go see this when I learned it was filmed completely on one stage, with a “set” like you’d see in a theater play (nonexistent doors that people “knock” on, etc.). But it was Lars Von Trier, and I totally dig (dug?) Lars – outside of “Breaking The Waves”, this is his best. It’s a three-hour transformation of Nicole Kidman from “poor girl on the run from the mob” to vengeful murderess, in a film that explores goodness and good intentions in that bizarre, off-kilter way that Von Trier has made his signature, and which is nearly impossible to describe.

The next 30, all of which are must-sees:

11. BLOODY SUNDAY
12. Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN
13. MARIA FULL OF GRACE
14. BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
15. AMELIE
16. REQUIEM FOR A DREAM
17. 4 MONTHS, 3 WEEKS AND 2 DAYS
18. SIDEWAYS
19. NOBODY KNOWS
20. GHOST WORLD
21. CHILDREN OF MEN
22. GRIZZLY MAN
23. LANTANA
24. THE DARK KNIGHT
25. DANCER IN THE DARK
26. WALL-E
27. 21 GRAMS
28. LET THE RIGHT ONE IN
29. TRAINING DAY
30. ADAPTATION
31. TOUCHING THE VOID
32. BRICK
33. MATCH POINT
34. TRAFFIC
35. AFTER THE WEDDING
36. THE HURT LOCKER
37. UNDER THE SAND
38. CHUCK & BUCK
39. JUNEBUG
40. REPRISE